Thursday, November 8, 2012

#NHBPM 8 of 30 - Write a letter to your health

Dear Crohn's Disease,

I want to break up. We've been together almost 10 years now, I've got the itch. Don't get me wrong, we have had some REAL adventures together. Remember that one time on the way home from dropping Deegan at school, we had Cameron in the back. You were all like "hey! I'm telling your bowels to go NOW" and I was all "not now, we aren't home yet" and you were all "well, too bad you better find somewhere!" Yeah, that sucked. Trying to get the baby out of the car seat and into the stroller - because I couldn't carry him in, I KNEW I was going straight to the bathroom - then doing the quick step walk careful to not make my stride TOO long for fear everything would just drop out. didn't matter my stride. You won that day. Thank God Cameron wasn't old enough to understand what was going on and thank God I had towels in the car. Normally people get in the shower completely dressed because they are stone cold drunk. I was sober as sober could be...and humiliated just the same.

I really appreciate you staying away when I was pregnant with Cameron. If something bad would have happened, I don't think I could have ever forgiven you.

My life would definitely be different without you. Better? Worse? I'm not sure. Health wise better I would hope. But my life, my being, my person - without you I wouldn't be so many of those things. You have had input in my choices, developed bits and pieces of my personality, molded my outlook on so many things. I do my best not to regret things or wish they were different, for then so many other things would also change. You take the good with the bad and do the best you can do.

1 comment:

  1. I love reading stories like this. Not because I like bad things, but because it happens to all of us and we won't let it stop us. By being open, we are saying it is normal, it will happen, and we move on. You are a strong person and this story confirms that. And yes, I have my own "accident" stories and have shared them online. It felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders after I wrote it. Hope all is well and you are better now.